Well there has been a lot of things for me to deal with recently. And its finally caught up with me after so long of having been pushed aside. There has been a lot of personal problems along with some financial obstacles. But with one only being true to oneself, pushing things to one side and trying to avoid dealing with it has proven to finally come to a standstill. I’ve only been able to bury my head in drawing pictures and now its time to stop. If I could draw pictures for a living, then that would be great. But I lack confidence to sell any work that I do.
I’ve been looking for some kind of work. However, it seems that no one really wants to hire me. I guess my CV/resume must be really bad. Maybe looking for an office job was a bad choice. I should just do something I have experience in, which is either dancing or working at a restaurant. Not really much choice. But it seems that is no one who can really help me decide. I’ve become pathetic in my oldish age.
Once a loner, always a loner right?
Thats what it feels like at the moment. I know isolating myself in my own bedroom is really not helping but I fail to feel the need to do anything else when others don’t seem to understand me that well. I’m not an open book that everyone gets. I’m strange in more ways than one.