Tag Archives: Plans

The things I’ve learnt

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking recently. Well, trying to at least. It tends to get really complicated and it all gets confusing. So here are the things that I’ve learnt.

First of all, Life is never going to be easy. Nothing will pan out EXACTLY how you want it to. Because you can’t consider everything clearly on the spot. There is always going to parts that we don’t think about it. Its not like we are super human and read all the different outcomes of one decision. As much as I wish I could see how things turn out or learn more about a situation, then that will definitely help me. But sadly that is not the case T__T

Second, If you are a foreigner in Japan and came for the possibly trying to settle down here… yeah, I am giving up on that right now. Most Japanese guys are interested in sleeping with a foreigner as some kind of trophy and never think that those who actually stay in Japan for longer than a holiday and the ones who are not those kinds girls. So guys should just stop even trying. It kind of makes me not want to be sociable here in Japan. Because I’m going to see at that horrible kind of prize. I am sure there are some guys who would like to be in a relationship where they want to settle down with a foreigner. But its even harder to find such a guy where I live. Sorry to say it.
(This is more of a reminder to myself than anything, I’ve just had horrible experiences with guys here so far, it could change in the future. But it most likely won’t).

Third, I really need to decide on how long I stay in this country. There have more moments than I like, where I do feel alone and like an outcast. But that is not just in the staff room at my schools. During my first year it was a lot better because I had a friend who I met up with a lot as we both arrived in Japan together. But since they left, no one has filled in the gap and I am at a lose at what to do. Now, I have been visiting friends in other cities and they have been a great help. Its just there are now some other factors creeping in where I feel like I just want to curl up into a ball and hide away.

Recently, I was asked if I could do more English lessons at my second job. Now I was very reluctant to say yes. I was basically asked if I could 6 days of the week. No offence, I love helping people learn English and have English conversations with them. . I was then told that it would move to Thursday’s so I would then get the weekend off to help plan for Monday’s lessons. This week however, I was asked to continue with the Saturday. Am I really over worrying about this? Because I work at three High Schools, most days I have 3-4 lessons I have to plan the whole lesson and worksheets. For myself, I also add in drawing pictures to help the students learn new words. All of this takes up a lot of my time. Recently I’ve been awake at 1am trying to finish it all and have the alarm sent for 5:40. That’s only a little over four hours sleep. I honestly don’t know how long I am going to last with all of this.  I signed a contract where I told my company that my second job would not interfere with my primary job. I just hope that it doesn’t or I am going to be under so much pressure that I hope I can cope with it all.

Fourth,  I really would like to try living in Korea after my time in this city is up. I really enjoyed my week holiday there during the summer and would like another holiday there to see different aspects that I didn’t get to see the first time. Then I will make the final decision of trying to apply for work there and move there for two years or more. The only uncertainty I have, is that most foreigners who have lived in this city in Japan can stay here for 3 years and then move. This is my second year and I don’t know if I have a longer limitation because I don’t work for the same company. That’s the only annoying this is that, I honestly don’t know how long I can here for. I don’t know if I can ask someone.

If I do get only 3 years, then I will certainly move to Korea in two years time for maybe 2 or 3 years. Before moving back home to England and finally move into my own house which is currently being rented. I just want to experience these two cultures before moving back (or if I go back depending on how things pan out). I feel like I wasted most of my life and wondered around in circles. Even last night I had a dream I was back at my old job and it was yearly review session with the head of my department. When someone I knew came into the room, sat down beside and then elbowed me when I started to agree that I was crap at my job. Instead, he flipped my switch and told my head of department what I really thought and got so angry that I punched them in face because I had enough. After that I woke up. I hope I never have a dream like that again. I want to be in a job that I enjoy and teaching here in Japan is something I enjoy and its a great life experience. I just wish I can make a decision on what the next chapter is going to be and when so I make more concrete plans.

Now In Tokyo!

In Tokyo!I have arrived in Tokyo!!  I am just waiting for my hotel room to warm up while I really plan where I want to go here.

Tue. 18th March: Ikebukuro, to walk around the shops and try and find the cinema such as this:
Durarara!!If you have watchedデュラララ!! then you will understand. Its definitely a great novel, manga and anime.  ROFL! Well its not often that I get to go to Tokyo, so I might as well do an Otaku thing LOL

I am sure I will looking around the shops and seeing if I can find a Hello Kitty store for presents for friends. But I am going to Shibuya, so if I can’t find what I’m looking for, there is bound to be something in Shibuya!

Then go to Shinjuku, to see if I can find the sculptures I’m looking for. There is one that I want to take a selfie next to! Just to show I’ve been there hahaha

Wed. 19th March (Optional): Going to Shibuya just to see what’s there and try to walk across the famous crossing!  Really, if I have time, I might try to go to Shibuya on Tuesday before I meet up with a friend to have a meal for my birthday.

Wed. 19th March: Visit a temple and see any other sites before going back to my hotel, to sleep before leaving in the morning to get to Narita Airport.

Life Goes On

Life Goes OnOkay so this will be the last time I up-date about this sort of thing for a while.

If you follow my facebook then you will already know that I got rejected recently. Well I can’t really blame the guy who is going to marry his fiancé soon. I really do know how to choose them. Anyway, at least I can’t say I tried. But is it bad that rather than hurting from a broken heart, I am numb more than anything?

I guess this is the fourth time in a row where it’s happened, so it’s not really a surprise or anything. Maybe I am just used to it by now. Isn’t there a phrase “Rejection is my only friend”? But isn’t better to have rejection as a friend, than regret? At least I can’t complain that I tried or that I wish I had tried harder. It is strange how things turn out now. But I guess in a way, I am glad it didn’t work out.

If anything, it has opened my eyes that maybe I don’t need to only stay here for four years, like I want to. But I am seriously thinking about working in South Korea too. I could even only stay here in Japan for three years and then maybe two years in Korea or something. I know I am getting close to thirty, and it is my twenty-eighth birthday in exactly one month’s time. So why can’t I explore the world now. Of course I would still love to go to South Korea for a holiday in the summer if I can. I’ve wanted to go there for a while and it is cheaper to fly from Japan than from the UK. At least there is that advantage. I will just have to look further into how about getting a job there. But it is not as if I need to decide soon because I still want to live in Japan longer. I am just thinking about after my job here before going back to England with more life experience and qualifications as a teacher.

In the grander scale of life, I am still really young and it could still just too early for me to settle. Although the peer pressure from other friends who have already got boyfriends and are settling down, it’s still hard to feel out of place. One thing is for sure, I know I am not getting any younger. I just need to live life at my own pace and try to put out the fact, that I am one of the few people who are focused on working (well I should be…) out of my mind.

It’s just a dream as it is to be living in a country I’ve always wanted to visit for years. I have a job here and a very nice apartment. So I just need to worry about that. Plus, since I was a child, I thought I wasn’t cut out for dating and that I would probably end up alone. So why am I disappointed by getting rejected. Okay I admit to being lonely and I’ve been like this for a while. So what is another 5, 10, 20 or so years going to do? At least I get to try and stand on my own two feet in Japan first.

I know I should really focus on learning the language and getting to understand the teachers around me. Maybe I should just try to find some classes first and then work from there. Learning on my own is only helping me in some degree.

I might be getting older, but I just to be confident in myself to not want a want to fill a gap that maybe men cannot fill.

I am going to Japan!!

daisuki

Oh yes people, I am going to Japan! I will be leaving in March to start work in April. I really couldn’t believe what I was reading when I got an email from the Recruitment office in Japan offering me a job. I really did think that I didn’t do well in the demo lessons that they wouldn’t offer me any placement at all. However, my friends kept telling me to believe and have more confidence in myself. I have tried for a similar position in Japan via the JET programme but I didn’t even get to the interview stage. Now that I have a TEFL qualification and have applied for work via one of the biggest companies who send ALTs to Japan, I have been more successful. One thing I am most unsure of, is my level of Japanese. I’ve tried my best to study the language myself. Yet when I had to introduce myself in Japanese for the presentation part of my interview.. I so hope it was good enough for them to understand. I have never spoken to anyone who is Japanese in Japanese before. So I wasn’t sure of what level my understanding actually is, so I went for Beginner as it is true in some ways.

The most exciting part now is beginning. I have to sent the last three forms of my application to Japan before the 10th January. Then I have to apply for the Certificate of Eligibility and apply for my visa before arriving in Japan. Once the CoE is completed, then my placement will be confirmed. Hopefully then I will find out where about in Japan I will be placed. I am not too fussy as to where I want to go. To me, as long as I get to experience life in Japan and do my best at my job then I will not mind at all. Its going to be a fresh new start for me where I can finally relax and become stronger in myself.

This past year has been the most difficult year of all. From hitting the lowest of the lows in life and doing things that I never thought I would do. To actually taking that jump, getting a qualification and being offered in a job that is my dream job really. I have always wanted to be a teacher from a young age because I want to help children learn more about the world and help them out in any way I can. Its amazing to watch a child grown and mature. Plus they can be so unpredictable that it makes life more entertaining.

So wish me luck for the future and please still contact me when I am there. I will miss my closest friends and family above all. So please don’t forget me!!

TEFL Course

Well I completed the 20 hour weekend TEFL Course!!! Although it was a lot of information given. I think I actually remember most of it. And now, It also means that I have basic teaching qualification in English!!!! I can now apply for jobs in Japan. However, I think I might take the other on-line courses available. The weekend course was great. But I think I need as much help as I can get. I am just glad that I passed the weekend course. Its really worth the money!

I just have to worry about when I actually go to Japan. I was looking at the jobs TEFL England has listed and they said that it would be leaving for Japan between March and July. But something else has come up to get me used to teaching. Someone on the course is actually the Dance teacher at my old High School. And I’ve been asked to go along and help with the Choreography classes. To help be an extra pair of eyes and help out. Everything is falling into place at long last. Its took its time but its getting there.